Open Letter to Catherine Hardwick

Dear Catherine Hardwick,
Please stop directing movies...stat! After viewing Chris Weitz's New Moon, I must insist that you please. Stop. Now. Watching Twilight for the first time, a year ago, I was disappointed leaving the theater, but then got over it because it was, well you know, TWILIGHT, so I had to like it or else my whole world would have collapsed as I put so much of myself into everything related to Twilight. After seeing New Moon, I feel like I can now officially scream, TWILIGHT SUCKED! You know why...because of you. New Moon had the same actors, screenwriter, producers and studio as your film and you know what? It DOES NOT SUCK! Guess it must be you. I'm sure if you could defend yourself you would cite the lack of budget as the reason your movie was horrendous. Well the budget was not much larger for this film and yes, it may have all went into special effects, but I'm thinking if you had not been a hack and in the hands of a good director, the film would have worked. Chris Weitz has prior special effect experience which is a huge plus and a genius move on Summit's part to get him on board for the second film. Looking back, why Summit hired you in the first place is such a mystery to me. At the time, I guess they were only going for the teen romance angle and didn't think a bunch of teens would care about the effects and if you could handle them. Well Summit was wrong, and now we have to live with the God awful results that will forever be Twilight, the movie. Walking out of New Moon my first thought was, "can they remake Twilight with another director?" I know this will never happen, mostly because the actors wouldn't go there again and it would be unprecedented. If by some miracle this did happen, you would deserve the embarrassment, sorry but true. You took a beloved work and hacked into a million cheesy pieces and I will never forgive you for it. I truly hope we have seen the last of your work, please say Bye-Bye to your directing career and go back to set design or whatever you did before you thought you could direct a watchable film.
Signed,
One Truly Pissed Off Twi-hard

Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince = Disappointing

Guess what Warner Brothers? Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince is no The Dark Knight...but you knew that and you knew that it would make good money in 2009, as good as it would have made in 2008, in spite of the fact that HBP is only half the film TDK was. I would have rather been disappointed last November then now, 8 months later. What a drag! My first words when the movie ended was "what a downer". I know that's what the book was like, but jeez, you couldn't have ended on some positive note? So many other things were changed, you couldn't have given us some reason to get excited for the final pair of films?
I felt this movie was the opposite of TDK. That movie was quickly edited and story heavy in the first half which was semi-difficult to follow. However, the last 60-90 minutes of TDK was perfect, a 10 in my opinion. HBP started out okay- I really liked the look to the film, it didn't feel like every other Potter film. But- after the burrow scene, the film just seemed to be one disappointment after another. The burrow scene was a let down- why was it there? We've been told it was to show that the Death Eaters were reeking havoc on both muggles and wizards, but Harry and Ginny never got to confront or duel with Fennir and Bellatrix, so what was the point? To scare Harry...for some reason?
Then the kiss in the room of requirement was a let down too. Harry got more out of Cho when they made out in Order of the Phoenix, and Ginny was totally hot and heavy with Dean earlier in HBP, but we only get a quick peck for our super-couple? WTH!
After those let downs, now we move onto the cave scene, that has to be awesome, right? Wrong! The cave was beautifully photographed and staged, but he Inferi were not scary enough and the scene seemed to end rather quickly...and boring like.
Okay now things are going to ramp up for the final scenes, or, not. What a huge mistake to cut out the first battle of Hogwarts. This film needed it, badly. I know that the David's (Heyman and Yates) said that they didn't want to repeat, and have two battle of Hogwarts since there is one in Deathly Hallows, but the books did, so why not the films? Another problem with the ending was the Snape business. I was out when he hushed Harry on top of the astronomy tower. Why did they have to change that scene so much? Why couldn't Harry have put on the cloak as he did in the book? Why did Snape see him and hush him? What was the point? I will admit that the Dumbledore parts in this scene were good: his delivery of "Severus, please" was just right; Malfoy disarming Dumbledore, which is totally necessary for the next two films, was perfect; and Dumbledore falling off the astronomy tower was a stunner (great slow motion shots).
Not as much love for the final Snape scene, it is cringe worthy. What a let down! I really respect Alan Rickman, but this was painful for me to watch.
Improves upon second viewing? I sure hope so...but I won't know until the DVD release, I refuse to spend more movie theater dollars on this one. If I wasn't so anal about having a complete DVD collection of the films, I would totally skip buying this one. Please David Yates, don't screw up Deathly Hallows!

Highlights of Comic-Con 2009

Why I love The Con, Transformers gotta eat!


First off a very big thank you to my fellow Twi-hards for your much improved behavior this year during the Summit panel on the first full day of Comic Con. The questions presented to the panel were far more interesting and relevant and you were more respectful; we could actually hear the very soft-spoken Rob Pattinson's responses this time around. I was pretending all morning that I was only camping out since 4:45 am for a glimpse of Tim Burton and the hope of all hopes that he brought along a special guest, but after the much improved behavior, I'm no longer ashamed to be a Twi-hard while at The Con.
The New Moon panel was for sure a highlight but it was not as awesome as the entire Disney presentation. Thankfully, Disney hired the very capable Patton Oswald to moderate and he was fantastic. I was such a squealing fangirl, even for Robert Zemeckis (I love Back to the Future & Forrest Gump). But the real screaming was during the highlight of day one, Tim Burton and his imaginary friend, Johnny Depp. I think two of the guys in front of me have permanent hearing damage now. It was kind of a bummer that they only brought the trailer for Alice in Wonderland and no extra Comic-Con special clips, but I'm not going to complain (can you believe it?) because it was awesome for them to just show up. The trailer looks amazing! It is classic Tim Burton: colorful, kooky, and magical.
The best fanboy moment of day one was by far when Jim Cameron walked out on stage. I loved the energy in the room from all the fanboys and the appreciation they had for him. I was so shocked when JC told us he had brought 25 minutes of footage from his upcoming film Avatar. I'm really wondering what kind of marketing idea this is, to show so much from the film when you know that it is going to be leaked on the internet about 30 minutes after the panel ends. I'm sure the buzz will be nothing but positive. I was blown away by the 3-D (which I'm not a fan of, as I'm not a fan of headaches) effects and the beautiful imagery in every scene. Sam Worthington doesn't look too bad either, hello! I wish he had been present for the panel afterward but he did send along a taped message. I was also blown away by how beautiful Sigourney Weaver is in real life.
After sitting in Hall H all day on Thursday it was nice to just walk the exhibit hall on day 2...Star Wars Day! I ran into a family of Mandalorians right off the bat. Where do they find the authentic looking baby suit? Guess you can get anything off the internet! While riding the escalator I spotted Han Solo and Boba Fett together about four steps below me and when they got to the bottom, Han adjusted Boba's helmet for him...must be true love! I didn't have the heart to tell Boba that one day Han will feed him to the Sarlacc (I know he escapes BTW, I do have Wookieepedia bookmarked). The best moment from day 2 is the one captured above. Where else can you see Transformers in line for food? I rode this high for hours. The crowds are a bummer but it's all part of the excitement and experience. I spent a lot of time in the Lucasfilm area, as the costumes the fans sported were just amazing.
I really liked the gaming area also this year, too bad most of the games seemed to be uberviolent or strictly for kids, but the layout was better than in the past.
For day 3 and 4...I stayed home! I know. I know. I fail as a fangirl! After driving back and forth for preview night and days 1 and 2; I just couldn't find the energy to make the drive one more time nor find the nerve to leave my kids with my super understanding husband one more day. Oh well, another successful year and I'm already looking forward to 2010!

Who Exactly are Michael Bay's Fans?

Aargh! I was back out on the IMDB Star Trek (2009) message boards last week and found a thread I just had to get into. Some guy had the nerve to suggest that if Michael Bay had directed Star Trek and it had been the same movie, it would have been panned because MB's name is on it, instead of JJ's. Is this guy serious? Of course the movie would have been panned, because it wouldn't have been the same! Duh! It would have been louder, cheesier, had an ending that was entirely in slow motion (for God only knows what purpose), and would have had one or two A list stars totally mis-cast.

How do I know so much about MB's movies, I've tortured myself by viewing at least two of them, and one, only yesterday. Flipping through the channels last night, I came upon Armageddon, a movie that didn't seem quite terrible the first time I viewed it in the theater back in 1998. But watching it again last night, I really had to try hard to not laugh, gag or be embarrassed for having it on at all. I came in about 40 minutes from the end, and wow, what a hunk of crap that movie is. I love Bruce Willis and man, I had a hard time looking at the TV every time he had to say his lines, I felt sorry for him. The worst was the montage when he died, ouch...that is the worst attempt at sympathy for characters from a director I've ever seen. Liv Tyler couldn't have been more bland after seeing her father die, and I have to give the credit for that to MB. The actors take their direction from the director, and that must have been his stroke of genius. I then sat through the super slow montage of various persons looking at the sky after the meteor is split in two. It reminded me of the end of Pearl Harbor, I can't bring myself to watch all of it, I saw who died and who she ended up with, and it seemed too forced...oh and it had another slow motion montage, what is up with that??!!

The other MB film I saw was The Rock. I had the pleasure of seeing this film in the theater while sitting only two rows from the screen. I've never come so close to throwing up in a theater. The editing and camera work was so poor, I couldn't follow the story, ha! I know, what story, but seriously, I was lost because I had to keep closing my eyes or else I would feel nauseous and lightheaded. Couldn't tell you if it had a slow motion montage at the end, I wasn't paying attention by then, I think I was trying to catch a nap.

One of the previews before Trek was for the upcoming Transformers sequel, and I turned to the husband after the preview ended and said "That movie is going to be loud, and nothing else, huh?". I know the fanboys are going to be crazy for this movie, but I have to abstain. I just can't support MB, I don't appreciate his style and I don't like his work, period.

I ended up posting to the thread on the Trek board with just a quick comment about how MB couldn't hold a film together the way Trek was held together, because he is a hack. Too harsh? Maybe. I just don't get it. Why does this guy have so many fans??

Go Back to Your Mom’s Basement for Another 40 Years

Aaargh!! I need to get off the Star Trek (2009) boards at IMDB. I cannot believe the amount of boneheads on that board who want to do nothing more than to snivel about their lost Trek cannon, the ruined timeline, the travesty of the destruction of Vulcan, and loads of other BS. GET OVER IT!! Geesh! The rest of us Star Wars babies are sick of hearing about how this Star Trek is too much like Star Wars…you know what? Star Wars is better, therefore this Trek ROCKED! That’s right; this was a Star Trek film that was actually good and entertaining! Get off your bloated high horse and enjoy the film for what it was…a good time at the movies.

A small part of me feels sorry for these people. I wish that they could’ve felt the same way I did when exiting the theater…joyous, exhilarated and ENTERTAINED! Isn’t that a big part of what a film is supposed to do? I left Trek feeling the same way I felt when I left Ironman a year ago, like I had just been entertained the hell out of for over two hours. Get over yourselves and your precious cannon...nobody cares!

Thanks for Nothing John Noe

Aaargh! Don’t you hate it when people disappoint you? I know it’s really my fault. I put unrealistic expectations on people, and so when they turn out to not meet those expectations, I end up completely disappointed. John Noe can’t help it that he let me down (or can he?)…I made him out to be an “expert” due to some stupid Podcast he happens to be on. Who is he anyway? Why did I give him so much power in my mind that I would be set up for such disappointment? I know it has to do with the fact that he is the person who introduced me to Twilight back in February of 2008. I’m sure I would have picked up the books eventually because six months later you couldn’t open a magazine or turn on the TV without being inundated with the fandom. But I’m proud of the fact that when I read the first book, I didn’t know that they were making a movie, I didn’t realize that there were hundreds of websites devoted to this series and that it was going to explode the way it did only a few short months later and I guess I’ve always credited John Noe with being the person who turned me on to my obsession before the pop culture Gods at Entertainment Weekly did. I’m proud to be a Twilight Original and it’s a big deal for me. John Noe is trying everything in his power to ruin that for me. Thanks for nothing!

Now I can’t even turn on an episode of one of John Noe’s podcasts without hearing him dig, rip, tear, or beat up Twilight and its fandom. I know I shouldn’t take it personally, he doesn’t even know me, but really? Do you have to show so much hate for something you gushed about only 13 months ago!! Do you even know how many people, like me; you probably turned on to the series, only to turn them off of YOU a year later?

I haven't clicked the unsubscribe button yet under Pottercast, but I'm very tempted. John's hatred has spilled over to the other hosts and when they all get in digs, boy, is that entertainment! Listening to sour grapes pop up every episode gets me all excited...not! To John Noe: Shut up about Twilight, get over it, and stick to Harry Potter!

The one bit of entertainment I have found in this mess is, listening to the rival Potter podcasters from Mugglecast- who also podcast about Twilight under Imprint, and happen to live with John (not to far from here)- discuss "someone" they know who turned on the Twilight series because of Renesmee's name and is clearly jealous about the explosion of the fandom and how it has taken press away from the Potter fandom. I enjoy listening to them in hopes that one day they let slip that it is John they are discussing. I'm pretty sure it is, at least I'm holding out hope that it is...just so I can make sense of why John Noe disappointed me.